We all know that life in general can be super stressful at times, but stress doesn't even being to describe the anxiety that I am feeling right now. It is my first senior year of college. I have a percussion exam to prepare for today and I'm not feeling so great about it. I have to perform on saxophone tomorrow and my parents are actually getting to come! The problem with that is because they are coming on a Thursday instead of the weekend, I on'y get to see them for like a couple hours maybe. I'm praying that God will make it to where I can be with them as much as possible since I hardly ever see them. They usually come to visit 2 or 3 times a year since I can't go see them. I have so many rehearsals, meetings, service projects, exams to study and practice for, grades to meet, and I'm sick. With what? No one knows. I have several swollen lymph nodes all over my body. I've heard that can be a normal thing, but it has never happened to me before. My dr has done some test so they'll call me soon and let me know what they find. I feel fine, but I am still worried. My mind is getting the best of me at this point in time. I also still owe about $2,000 on my school bill this semester. I've been trying to work and pay it off. I've also been trying to get my saxophone fixed. I am having to play on my instructors sax since mine is in the shop. I just want MY horn back. I'm a little emotionally drained as well because my best friend is graduating this December and there is a guy I like but he doesn't like me back. Things are weird. I have to go rehearse with my accompanist now.
Love, a stressed out schizophrenic.
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